I have wracked my brains out trying to think of a sublime moment, and only one has come to mind, and yes it has to do with a boy. To give some background into the situation, I had known this boy since eighth grade. He was quite a looker, blonde hair, blue eyes, and a heart throb for many of the girls attending Westminster Academy. I met him in math class, fourth period, and have been in love with him ever since. This boy and I became quite good friends, much to my delight. I told his best friend numerous times of my likings towards him, but somehow they were never relayed. Several times my heart broke, like when I found out he was taking his best friend’s cousin to prom, or that he had been crushing on another girl during the summer months when I was unable to see him. Fast forward five years to the infamous senior year, when all your hopes and dreams come true. Well I suppose mine did as my high school fairy tale played out. Since January of 2007, when he had invited me to a New Years Party, to Valentines Day when we went on our first unofficial date together, we flirted with our feelings for one another. He played it slow, very slow however, and at times I was filled with doubt that anything would finale our affections.
It was March 1, 2007. I recalled the night before, when I had been filled with emotion to clarify the unspoken issue…us. I confided in my diary (as any high school girl would) about my feelings to say something to him, anything, but that was clearly impossible because I lacked the confrontational balls to do so…and because he was the old-fashioned type, I assumed he should and would be the one to address the issue. And I was right. The day went as normal. History, English, Lunch. Lunch was my favorite because he was there, waiting for me to eat with him. Today was different however. The conversation seemed lull and cumbersome, like we were both skirting around the unspoken issue. With only about ten minutes left, he turned to me and said everything that I had been waiting for, “I want to talk to you about us. I know I have kept you waiting and wondering, but I wanted to make sure this was right first. I talked to my parents, and they advised me to pray and wait. I prayed, but I couldn’t wait. I know I want to be with you, do you want to be with me?” Then the sublime happened. My voice had escaped me, leaving only my expressions to vocalize my emotions. I rapidly shook my head up and down, smiling from ear to ear. He laughed at my inability to speak, before saying goodbye and heading off to class. He told me later all he wanted to do was run around and scream for joy, which is exactly what I did as soon as I was in the confinements of my friend Kara’s car. I was the happiest person on the face of the earth that day, and two years and seven months later, I still am the happiest person on earth because I am with this most amazing boy, Lukas Settle.
The sublime for me, was an overwhelming release of perplexed emotions, and when those emotions turned out for the better, I experience complete happiness. I speculate people seek out situations like this because before the sublime, the unknown occurs. What is going to happen to me when I bungie jump? What is going to occur in the scary movie, and how will it affect me? The unanswered mystery intrigues them, and to experience it releases a rush of emotion and adrenaline that feels so humanly overwhelming. Without the sublime, there is little excitement, and people thrive off excitement.
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