“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment.” – Thoreau
When I first thought about living life to the fullest, I viewed it as living life without restriction: being happy 100% of the time, never saying no to a selfish ambition, or yes to self-sacrificing demand; it was the most self-centered way of living. Sometimes I feel I have devoted my life to entertaining the needs of others so much, that the thought of abandoning everything, right here, right now, would be the answer to my complete happiness. I often question how I would feel, and what others would think, if I took my most prized possessions, jumped on a plane to the sunny beaches of California, and made a home for myself there, doing as I pleased and when I pleased. If I felt like skipping work one day, I would. If I felt like eating a Big Mac, French fries, large coca-cola, and an ice-cream Sunday, I would (without feeling guilty). If I felt like getting on a bike at two in the morning, and just riding for endless hours on the boardwalk and hills of the city, I would. If I wanted to sleep in till four in the afternoon, and skip classes, I would. If I felt like lying on the beach all day, then jumping into a stranger’s pool, I would. If I felt like going shopping and spending $2,000 of my parent’s money, I would. All these things would make me happy, no one could instruct me to do differently, and I would be living MY life to the fullest, right?
Thoreau states “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” If this is true, then these men have let certain things, ideas and people get in the way of living life to the fullest. Essentially, nothing would hold me back in my life-pleasing routine. The authority my parents have over me would dissipate, and my boyfriend’s input would be insignificant. Due dates for assignments and tests that my teacher’s have established would be meaningless, and my boss and coworkers opinions would prove worthless. I would be my own person, living the life I want to live, and making my own rules, not guided by anyone else’s influence. The more I think about this lifestyle, I realize a lot of regret would accompany it. Completely abandoning the life I live now would make a lot of people unhappy. I would owe my parents crazy amounts of money, my boyfriend would be lonely and I would miss him, my body would probably implode from all the fast food, my grades would suffer, and I would probably lose my job. The repercussions outweigh the momentary happiness by far. In making myself 100% happy and living a self-centered life without restriction, I would bring down everyone I know, ultimately leading to my own downfall.
Through thoughts such as these, I have a better understanding of Thoreau’s ideology to go into the woods and completely surrender all material possessions, because it isn’t until you have lost everything, that you realize how much you appreciate. Little things like my boyfriend surprising me with flowers, my mom making my favorite meal or filling up my gas tank for me, or my dad covering my portion of the bill for my cell phone. And it’s not just the things that people do for me, but what I can do for others; such as making my boyfriends and his roommates dinner, or taking my brother to the movies, or helping my mom clean the house. It’s actions like these that make me appreciate life, and keep me content. I suppose then, that if I’m content, I AM living life to the fullest because I want nothing more, and nothing less.
Therefore, living life to the fullest for me is being content. It is learning from my past mistakes, and making better use of myself for the present. It is pleasing others to please myself. It is being surrounded by those who I love and care about most, and experiencing life to the fullest with those people. Because of this, I would never deliberately construct my life to overcome obstacles that hold me back from living life to the fullest. It would be the most egotistical action I could ever take, and it would eventually drive me to complete discontent. I would be a lost puppy without some authority in my life and an incomplete soul without someone to please. Consequently, I need to remind myself, “Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life so. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something.” – Thoreau
This is a very wise post. One of my friends used to spend most of each summer hiking and camping. When I asked him why, he said, "I like toast. It's almost impossible to make good toast on a campfire. Every once in a while I find myself taking toast for granted. A week or so on the trail helps me appreciate the toast and all the other things--like flush toilets--I don't pay attention to everyday."
ReplyDeleteAll Thoreau was about was conveying the idea that we should each live deliberately and remain awake to our lives. In the conclusion to _Walden_, when he is talking about why he leaves the pond, he says, "Thank Heaven, everywhere is not here," and "I had other lives to live." After a while, Thoreau began not seeing an appreciating the wonder of Walden which was so apparent early on. At that point, he knew he needed a change, so he could return to being awake to the wonder of his life.
From your post, it looks as if you have learned some degree of awareness and wonder at all you do have. You do, however, make one mistake. The full life isn't having every whim or doing as you please. Something else Thoreau said may help here, namely, "You are rich in proportion to the things you can afford to leave alone." Finding you don't need to each fast food every day to be happy, that you can leave it along as view it as a treat, is a form of being rich. The trick, of course, is knowing allowing yourself to know yourself well enough so you aren't living your life to please others, but--as you say--pleasing yourself by pleasing others.
Steve
Lauren-
ReplyDelete"If I felt like skipping work one day, I would. If I felt like eating a Big Mac, French fries, large coca-cola, and an ice-cream Sunday, I would (without feeling guilty). If I felt like getting on a bike at two in the morning, and just riding for endless hours on the boardwalk and hills of the city, I would. If I wanted to sleep in till four in the afternoon, and skip classes, I would. If I felt like lying on the beach all day, then jumping into a stranger’s pool, I would. If I felt like going shopping and spending $2,000 of my parent’s money, I would."
hahaha you mean you don’t live like this on a day to day basis. pshhhhh. You’re missing out. Just joking, I often wish I could do things like that too....just like you said you sometimes wish you could pack up and move to Cali, in the same way I would love nothing more than to just pack up and move to Colorado, but it’s hard to do that with having to leave what I got going on here. It’s almost like you would have to fall off the map to just to pull a stunt like that. I agree with much everything you say, It would be very hard to live and self-indulgent life, and I believe that sort of life would get lonely quite fast. And after hearing what you have to say, it does not seem like something that you want. It seems like you enjoy a healthy balance of pleasing yourself and your friends, and if that’s what you enjoy it looks like you’re on the healthy track to living a full life.